Thursday, February 18, 2010

We Are the World: There Can Only Be ONE.

Dave alerted me to the new version, and I mean, Jesus, what a bunch of fuck-monkeys were allowed in that studio. They even used MJ ghost footage! That kind of thing is going to bring BACK African hunger, which all these artists so heroically ended:

I mean, I'm sorry, that is a musical POWERHOUSE. When you lead-off with Lionel Richie, Stevie Wonder, Paul Simon, and the Gambler, you have MJ, Springsteen, and Dylan batting clean-up, and then you close with Ray Charles? You aren't topping that. And are there some jokers in there? Sure. I think I saw Max from Saved By the Bell. But still--color me inspired.

Two final thoughts:
-Diana Ross effortlessly blows everyone away.
-I read that Lionel Richie and MJ wrote this song in twenty minutes.


  1. Impressive. Amongst all the "who the hell are they"s, I'm most curious about the guy that immediately follows Kenny Loggins' first appearance, and the guy with the glasses on the top step of the group sing. That second guy looks like he could be one of the artists' business manager. And I don't know what to say about the first guy.

  2. Just watched the new one. Uff.

    1. Did they really just use voice distortion? We Are the World and you still have to hide the fact that you can't sing? I don't care. Just give it to me au natural.

    2. In the group shots, does it look like anyone is even remotely comfortable being around anyone else there?

    3. Who's the Kim Kardashian looking chick that gets so much solo time? Is she from the Pussycat Dolls?

    4. Was it a little depressing to anyone else to see the older artists, like they were there because maybe they got froze out of the original?

    5. Wouldn't it have been a better alternate version if they had gone more with the island rhythms that they used at the very very end?

  3. The two people you mention are Steve Perry from Journey and Dan Ackroyd. The Dan Ackroyd thing always weirded me out.

  4. Re: the new one.

    If you asked me the two worst things it could possibly include, I really might have said T-Pain singing with AutoTune, and Jamie Foxx doing a Ray Charles impression.

    I honestly think the 30 Rock liver parody was a better effort.

  5. What's the opposite of a fine wine? I feel like the new one is that. The more I think about it/hear it, the worse it gets.

  6. Right! The Jamie Foxx impression of Ray Charles killed me. I forgot about it when I was running through all the other things that seemed awful about the new one, but that was an especially bad moment. Extremely self indulgent for a song that's supposed to be about being selfless.

  7. no matter what role he actually played, I blame for everything.

  8. Ben Affleck makes me laugh in the new one